2) Power dynamics and morality quickly get messy
Peer relationships are one thing. Having a relationship with your manager or someone who evaluates you is an entirely different matter. Team members look at who takes on important projects, who leaves early, and who is granted time off at random, all of which contribute to harmful perceptions of favoritism. Appearance matters, even when everything is voluntary and ethical.
Office relationships can have measurable career impacts… sometimes leading to increased pay or opportunities while the relationship lasts, and sometimes resulting in severe penalties when it ends. Romantic ties between managers and subordinates can create temporary earnings gains for subordinates that disappear (or even reverse) after breakups and leaving jobs.
Economic and reputational swings are real. The Wall Street Journal Cover research shows such patterns and a long tail of consequences when relationships end.
There’s also a legal side: If a relationship ends badly, allegations of harassment, retaliation or unfair treatment can quickly follow. This often occurs when there is a power imbalance and one party feels coerced, bullied or disadvantaged as a result.
What to do: Don’t think that “consent” makes things safer if one person is in charge of another. Check your company’s policies, have a personal conversation with HR when you can and, if you can, set up a change in reporting line. Treat the relationship as a personal risk that may require choosing between job and romance if HR is ambiguous or antagonistic.
