Violence against women is not just a personal tragedy – it is one of the world’s most widespread human rights violations. Violence against women must be eliminated!
Whether it manifests as domestic violence, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, intimate partner violence, psychological abuse, financial abuse, spiritual abuse, sexual harassment, or any other form of violence, it affects women, adolescent girls, youth, families, communities, and entire societies worldwide.
Every year on November 25, we recognize the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women – the day of remembrance of Las Hermanas Mirabal (the Mirabal Sisters), political activists in my country, the Dominican Republic, who were brutally murdered in 1960, at the behest of Rafael Leonidas Trujillo, better known as Trujillo. Against people, especially motivated by his sexist and racist views.
In an effort to raise awareness of violence against women based on their gender, since 1981, the United Nations has celebrated the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women.
Calls for violence – both online and IRL
This year, the United Nations is calling for awareness of digital violence and encouraging everyone to join the UNITE campaign – an initiative of 16 days of activism on December 10 (International Human Rights Day).
Digital tools are increasingly being used to stalk, harass, threaten and abuse women and girls, especially with the rise of artificial intelligence. This includes cyberbullying, trolling, threats, harassment, AI-generated images, hate speech, stalking, grooming, sexual exploitation, impersonation and more!
According to the UN, digital violence targets women more than men at all levels of life, but especially those with public or online visibility – such as activists, journalists, women in politics, human rights defenders and young women..
These violent acts affect women and girls worldwide, and they often lead to offline violence in real life (IRL), such as rape, physical abuse, and even femicide.
About one in three women have experienced physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence, non-partner sexual violence, or both at least once in their lifetime. These include dating partner and adolescent abuse.
Every 10 minutes a woman or girl is killed by their intimate partner or family. The impact is compounded for women and girls who face discrimination because of their race, socioeconomic status or lifestyle.
I can attest that the damage of violence against women affects survivors long term and sometimes, it is a lifelong battle.
A world free of gender-based violence
there is hope While addressing violence against women may seem like a huge undertaking, it can be easy to do our part to break the suffering, silence and shame for a world free of gender-based violence.
As an advocate and a survivor, and a speaker at the United Nations in support of Sustainable Development Goal #5 (Empowering Girls and Women), I have come to deeply believe this truth:
Our best defense against violence against women is each other.
Why “one another” is more important than ever
The United Nations calls for policies, laws, international conventions (such as the Istanbul Convention), and updated frameworks (such as the Second Edition of Respect for Women). All this matters. We must advocate for access to health care, legal counsel, and essential services for women. No doubt.
And yet, at the same time, we know that change begins with people — with culture — with community. With me – with you.
We all know that violence thrives in silence, secrecy and shame. Violence against women exists and persists because of social norms that excuse, minimize or normalize harm. Ending violence and preventing violence requires collective action, not just individual survival strategies.
Telling women to “be safe” is not enough. We need to create a world where women safe.
And that world can exist only when:
- We believe in and support survivors
- We intervene when we see harm or when someone is in immediate danger
- We learn to recognize the early signs of abuse
- We teach relationship skills rooted in respect and model compliance and equity
- We ensure digital security online and in the digital space
- We call out harmful social norms, even (and especially) in public spaces
- We amplify unheard voices and promote women’s movements and civil society organizations
- We advocate for justice and hold policymakers accountable
- We protect victims of violence from further harm
- We educate each other and refuse to normalize abuse in any form
This is how we fight violence — not alone, but together.
Shifting the burden to women
For too long, the narrative has put the onus on women:
- Don’t walk alone.
- Don’t wear that.
- Don’t trust him.
- don’t go there
- Don’t disturb him.
This message, along with the old questions “Why didn’t you leave?” or “Why did you choose him in the first place?”, blaming the victims when the violence is not our fault. I’ve been through it so many times, and the most damaging was in the courtroom, facing that man Kidnapping Raped me, and almost killed me with a baseball bat.
We must stop believing and encouraging the idea that women must fend for themselves from A world unwilling to protect them. Preventing violence is not a woman’s sole responsibility – it is the responsibility of everyone who believes in basic human rights, gender equality, and the right of every woman and girl to live to her full potential.
We must shift the conversation from “women need to protect themselves” to “we need to protect each other.”
Safe people save people
I always say safe people save people. Whether in homes, digital spaces, schools, neighborhoods, workplaces, refugee camps, climate-protected settings, or places of worship, solidarity is a lifeline.
When a family member, neighbor, teacher, employer, or friend listens, supports, and intervenes, survivors of violence are more likely to seek help and escape.
When communities reject harmful norms, challenge gender inequality and embrace equality, the cycle begins to break.
When young people learn early about respect, boundaries, empathy and digital safety, they become part of a new generation that refuses to tolerate violence.
And when women stand together, share stories, demand justice, lift each other’s voices, the world changes.
Tragically, many of us expected our families, congregations and communities to support us and yet are left with the pain of abuse, the heartbreak of betrayal and the pain of being completely alone as our world falls apart.
A safe and loving friend not only in the moment where violence is happening or has already happened, but also as a shield against violence against women. Violence is preventable, but prevention requires participation.
Eliminating stigma, silence and shame
In a world where we are told to protect ourselves through fear, isolation, silence and blame that creates stigma and shame, we need to remind each other that true protection lies in love. This is demonstrated through community support and connection and by calling upon our collective strength.
Arising together is the antidote to violence:
- Women are safest when we hold each other.
- Women are strongest when we believe in each other.
- Women are protected when we protect each other.
It is not a woman’s matter; This is a global problem, a humanitarian problem and requires awareness and accountability.
We are not each other’s competitors – we are each other’s protection.
- We are each other’s shields.
- We are each other’s witnesses.
- We are each other’s advocates.
And that’s beautiful, because it means that each of us can do something to empower those affected by gender-based violence and prevent it in all forms and on every platform (both online and offline).
Let’s unite!
Let us raise our voices in solidarity to support women and girls, so that they can stop shrinking and hiding and feel safe enough to grow and thrive. Let’s stand together – as sisters, as one.
So ask yourself today, What is one small way I can protect, support or empower a woman or girl today? Share with us in the comments below.
Founder of Positive MOM® and creator of the STORY System: a blueprint for creating and sharing powerful stories that will transform your results and help others do the same. Dr. Alaina Fernandez A single mother of 4, an award-winning storyteller, story strategist and student of pain. He is a best-selling author, internationally acclaimed keynote speaker and 5x TEDx speaker. He has spoken at the United Nations, received the President’s Volunteer Lifetime Achievement Award, and been elected Top influential leaders and a Dominant woman By Success Magazine. Connect with Elaina thepositivemom.com/ef And follow @thepositivemom. To receive a gift from Elaina, Click here.
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