become a member Cost as low as $4/month and enjoy unlimited reading of the TSLL blog.
“In life, many of us forget that we really can choose for ourselves, that we can create a life custom made“ — Nathan Furr and Susannah Harmon Furr, authors of The rise of uncertainty
In France, the phrase custom made Translated as “made to measure” in English, but American expats now living in Paris, Nathan Furr and Susanna Harmon Furr, explain in their book The rise of uncertainty“The English word misses the real power of the idea. The French words highlight the special quality of choosing and the joy of creating something. your need right.”
As we go through childhood, our experiences depend largely on our parents and caregivers. Where we go, what we do, who we meet and where or where we travel depends on the openness and curiosity of others. If we’re lucky, we grow up in an environment that provides us with a sense of sanctuary to relax our minds and pursue our curiosity, while also regularly introducing us to new experiences and glimpses of the world. Not all that we will remember, but the expansion of the various ways life was sprinkled for us to witness. If this were not the case, if we were not encouraged to explore and learn about worlds outside of how we live our daily lives, our understanding of what is possible would be limited—unless we read, unless we become an explorer ourselves with the resources available to us.
All this being said, some of us will realize that we can be the architect of our life but it depends on many factors. Others of us may know we can be architects, but don’t feel supported to do so if it looks slightly or drastically different from our social support structure. And even if we were limited in our explorations at an early age, for whatever reason, when we ventured out into the world to learn, see, and experience, we brought with us baggage from our past that may have distorted the lens through which we saw the world.
But regardless of your past experience with the idea of designing your life, today’s post is shared to reawaken or reinforce the awareness that yes, your life is yours to design.
“You don’t have to be a victim of your environment. You can be its architect.”
-James Clear, Atomic practice
What we see as we journey through life, especially at a young age, may seem like the cement foundation of “how life is,” but that cement foundation can be removed and replaced if what we see doesn’t nourish us or sit well with us for some reason we may not yet be able to identify. The most effective way to change the foundation is to become aware of your mind and mindset (ie, the limitations) you have accepted about what is possible and how life should be lived.
Fait sur mesure becomes a tool that, when we embrace it, combined with courage and clarity, leads to building a life that brings us to life. We become the directors and heroes of our lives rather than being directed by others about what to do and how to live. We give ourselves agency.
As I was re-watching its episodes Ten percent (Call My Agent) To remind myself recently how the series ended, as the film premieres this September, the importance of an agent (an effective one) is a career lift. Add in control over how you manage your life and being the protagonist of a script that’s best suited to you and your strengths (including an agent who knows what they’re good at), then you’ve got the trifecta of synergy for developing your best self.
When we entrust the direction of our lives to someone or something (an institution, culture, ideology), when we don’t spend time getting to know ourselves so that we know where to point our sails, we give up the control that can absolutely be ours if we choose to take it and seize it.
You might be saying, “Sure, it sounds great, but I need to make money or I need financial support, so I have to do what I have to do, even if it doesn’t suit me.” “We can all create a life that measures right. It’s not about money.” As its author The rise of uncertainty Note, “Often the rich and famous—those who can afford to have everything custom made—are busy copying.” Which means, more money can’t buy courage, can’t buy clarity, can’t buy security in itself.
When we stop seeking the good opinion of the world, we are freed to think for ourselves. This does not mean that we become opposites for the sake of opposites, rather we begin to pay attention to what speaks to us, what really pleases our senses, our mind, and piques our curiosity to learn more about it.
This past weekend, as I sat at a table playing Scrabble with a colleague who enjoys the game at a local weekly meet-up, our table was finished. As we neared the end, players from other tables gathered in the round and (after being invited to do so) tried to help us talk with the tiles left in each rack. At this point, we knew who the winner would be, but neither of us wanted to give up trying to use the tiles we had. A community of people who love words, I find it delightfully fun. Being surrounded by fellow logophiles (lovers of words). Now this is an interest that speaks to my curiosity, and it was not something that I was introduced to by my environment as a child, but rather something that I discovered as I traveled and believed and followed in my youth.
A ‘made-to-measure’ or custom made Life doesn’t happen by accident. It is intentional. This must be because it is much easier to follow and follow the currents of inspiration by the many lives that surround us immediately. Admittedly, another reason many people don’t live a life of faith is that it takes courage.
But I have good news for you! These feelings of fear and dread occur early, and even if they do pop up after our journey, they are not nearly as intense or considered a deterrent. Rather, simply an obstacle that you will navigate around and something that you will do without hesitation. Why? “When you begin to see satisfaction (your custom specification),” you begin to believe that the permission you’ve given yourself to shape a life is worth more than the initial uncertainty you must face.
How and where do we start customizing our lives?
1. Start by accepting the fact that you have one life to live. Memento Mori
The authors remind readers of this Latin phrase, which means, “Remember, you must die.” These are not scary words, but rather to awaken each of us to the reality that we are all part of the contract we are simply born with. And then the question becomes, as the poet Mary Oliver enthusiastically asks him, “Tell me, what do you plan to do with yourself? one wild and precious life?”
2. Determine the elements or ‘dimensions’ of how you want your life to feel.
Do you want to wake up, enjoy, see and experience? You don’t get it perfectly in the first design, no designer can; That’s why they have stuff, but you have to start somewhere and then you start living in a way that brings that stuff into your life. Some will be more readily available, and others will take time. Part of living a simple luxury life is daring to be a student of ourselves and then choosing to learn the skills that guide our life path (relationships, career, etc.) that will help us build the life we dream of, the peace we want to feel, the fulfillment that is possible when we tap into our true selves.
3. Whose tailor-made life inspires you?
One of the gifts I’ve received from being a guest on the podcast is choosing people who bravely offer inspiration to live their own unique lives. They don’t necessarily live the life I want, but they choose to live their own. Asking them how they did it, what they had to overcome and anything that provided insight into how they knew the path they chose to travel, even though it was a traditional path or different from their previous path, is something that has been fascinating to hear.
Anyone who gives you an example of a fat-sur-measure life, whether you know them to talk to or not, maybe you’ve read their biography or watched a documentary, learn more about their journey because it’s made available to do so. ask questions “Was it hard to give yourself permission?” That question, as suggested The rise of uncertaintyHelp remind us that moving forward is, by its very nature, going to be scary. Hearing from others who have traveled their own path and overcoming this fear will be self-empowering to create your own path.
4. Start small
Whether you like your wardrobe, have a signature look of some sort. Not for you to notice it, but for building up the courage to embrace the choices that lift you up and sing your song.
Or maybe how you decorate – a single room, like your office or bedroom, or a large or entire house or home.
ritual. Any regular repetitive activity or routine that appeals to you emotionally is a way to customize your life. And when you feel how it strengthens, comforts, and nourishes you, it begins to strengthen the seeds you sow that continue to shape your entire life for those who come into your life and support you. Live your religion.
5. Plan a trip, a visit, a tour, etc. that incorporates many elements of your choice.
I love this suggestion made by the authors, and found it very confidence-boosting when it comes to making a life-long customization. With almost every trip I take to France or England, I choose the places on my itinerary, including my accommodation, that I feel (and want to confirm or already know and enjoy) best suit my ‘shape’ and preferred way of feeling nourished. After all, if we never feel something and only think that we might like, for example, a high-waisted pant, we don’t know for sure how it feels until we try it on and walk around in it like in our daily life. This is how we modify our initial list of ingredients so that it is ultimately tailored to our tastes and needs.
What we are talking about is in the heart When we choose to build such a life to measure selecting Simply live in luxury, Because no two simple luxury lives are the same. They can’t be. Each of us is different, with different strengths born with us and skills nurtured throughout our lives due to the experiences, events and people we encounter along the way. We live in different parts of the world at different moments in the calendar’s ever-increasing progression. Our emotions, which tickle our curiosity, cannot always be explained why they arise, but if we know ourselves, we know that they make us alive.
Our personal elements are unique, and we enrich our lives every day by understanding what those elements are and welcoming them into our lives, while discarding or not including those that dull the flavor.
If you’re just starting to build your fat-sur-measure life, today might be the first day you start listening to what brings you to life and what sinks your soul. Note it down in a journal – what you’re learning is quiet guidance on how to find your way. And if you’re already on your path, as I know many are in TSLL’s vast international community, be brave, savor the nourishment, and let the life you’re creating bring more peace to your days so you can spread that peace to the world. sister journey
Similar posts you might enjoy
Learn more about ~ TSLL’s Content Masterclass: View detailed syllabus, watch trailer, read reviews and more.
