The future is fake. This is a trick someone uses to keep you optimistic.
stuck
It keeps you longer than a relationship that isn’t working for you, at best. Or hurt you, worst.
Holiday Promise. Celebrate a special holiday. A shared future together. They promise that these things will happen one day.
You find yourself waiting for the elusive day that never comes.
Future-false promises. It requires no effort or sacrifice. It’s a carrot dangled in front of you that you’ll never reach.
And you keep waiting because some things that are promised sometimes happen. The next piece is a piece of cake.
But the truth is, future fraud requires little effort and little thought or care.
Anyone who relies on future cheating to maintain a relationship gets themselves a reward the moment they commit to you.
They can be imbued with good feelings that make you feel optimistic and happy for the time being. They get your consent and misguided trust and affection for a time.
They weren’t resigned to waiting around, hoping it would happen one day. They have already received their reward.
By committing to a better future, they avoid present problems that need solving or attention This allows them to maintain control and avoid accountability.
They make you feel anxious and hopeful at the same time, endlessly waiting to see if they will deliver on their promises.
Anyone who does this regularly, and not just once, is participating in a pattern of manipulative behavior.
If this is happening to you, evaluate the current relationship and what is happening right now, not some distant promise of change.
Pay attention to their actions and make sure their words match. Look for the pattern of aligned words and verbs to decide if it’s something you can continue to take.
Realize that you are wrong to expect someone else to get better without any evidence of improvement possible About someone, and not admitting who they really are.
They mourn the loss of the future they promised you. Learn how to forgive yourself for holding on to something that never materialized.
Be a good person yourself. Make sure your words and actions are also aligned.
And then you can go in peace.
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This post was Previously published at medium.com.
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Photo credit: Steve Young at Unsplash
